the lovely Lourdes

Lourdes is new to our family. When I go to work, I leave Pen in the kind and capable hands of Lourdes. She does not simply take care of Pen. She reads to her. She plays with her. She sings to her (in Spanish). And she loves her. For which I am very grateful. It is her job to take care of my daughter. But it is a gift that she loves my daughter.

Lourdes has one daughter of her own, a seventeen-year-old named Marcella. But Lourdes has always wanted more children, always wished to be a mother many times over. And as she says with all tenderness, "God said, no more babies." So, she has adopted all the children she cares for as her own. It's her way of putting all the love she has in her tremendous heart to good use -- and we are the very lucky beneficiaries.

Because it's hard to leave Pen. And Ben and I are both adjusting to being away from her. So, something hard is made easier by knowing that she is with Lourdes.

Yesterday, I came home, and Lourdes was folding my laundry. My laundry. This feels strange and complicated. I've been doing my own laundry for a long time now. And it feels somehow wrong to accept someone in my house doing my laundry. I don't take it for granted, but it's hard to receive.

I thanked her. And Lourdes said, "Don't worry. You're tired."

And she is right. She is so right. I am tired. I am tired. I am tired. And I'm just trying to figure it all out and juggle everything and somehow get it right.

So, this is my big realization about being a mom, and it's completely humbling. You need all the help you can get. You need every meal your neighbor brings. You need every moment of understanding your coworker gives you. You need every night of babysitting your sister-in-law offers.

You need every load of laundry someone is willing to do.

So.

It turns out Lourdes is not just taking care of Pen. She's taking care of me too.