twenty-nine-and-a-half weeks

A day in the life, 7+ months pregnant:

Good morning! It's me! Your baby! Kicking your ribs and your bladder! At the very same time. When I say, good morning, I mean 3 o'clock in the morning. Ha, haaa!

Good morning, again! It's me! Your stomach! I'm starving in here. It's been eight hours since we last ate. Why do you deprive me in this cruel way?

Start the day with coffee. Yes, it's caffeinated. Don't let others judge you for this. You relish coffee. You need coffee.

Supplement coffee with very-high-fiber cereal to counteract the side effects of that iron supplement you're taking.

Then, go to work.

Have a snack.

Have another snack.

Drink mandated amount of water.

Go to the bathroom.

Go to the bathroom again.

I need a snack.

Hello! It's me! Your baby! These ribs are getting in the way.

Lunch. Finally...

Go to bathroom.

Continue drinking mandated amount of water.

Have a snack.

Hi! It's me! Your baby, again. Knock. Knock. It's me. Your baby. Hello, hello. Pay attention to me. I insist.

Head home.

Have a snack.

Have dinner.

Have another snack.

It's 8:30 p.m. Give up on life. Everything is overwhelming and makes you extremely tired.

You made it until 9:30! Good for you. Go to bed now.

Find a comfortable sleeping position. Try again. Try again. Nope. Try again.

Finally fall asleep.

Go to the bathroom.

Go to the bathroom again.

And again.

Repeat from above.